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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30145497">Zombie Apocalypse</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AppleSeeds/pseuds/AppleSeeds'>AppleSeeds</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Good Omens (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Human, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxious Aziraphale (Good Omens), Brave Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley has long hair and a Scottish accent, Fear, First Kiss, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Infected Characters, M/M, Mentioned Beelzebub (Good Omens), Mentioned Gabriel (Good Omens), Mentioned Newton Pulsifer, Mentioned Sandalphon, Meteor, Mind Manipulation, Separation, Tadfield Air Base (Good Omens), Vehicle Crash, Virus, Zombie Apocalypse, Zombies, uplifting</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 12:00:59</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>18,619</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30145497</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AppleSeeds/pseuds/AppleSeeds</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When a meteor strikes Earth carrying a virus that can 'turn people into zombies', Aziraphale finds himself responsible for a group of frightened teenagers at an airbase-turned-hospital in Tadfield. Aziraphale is terrified, but experiences some relief when the teens introduce him to Crowley, who has a plan to get them all to safety. When things don't exactly go according to plan and with the zombies closing in, Aziraphale must face his fears in order to protect the children from becoming infected.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Aziraphale &amp; Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>103</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Courts GO Re-Reads, Good Omens Human AUs</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Fear</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>If you've seen the thing this is based on, you'll pretty much know the whole plot (sorry)! I'll mention it at the end of the fic for anyone who doesn't know it!</p><p>Please check the tags before you start reading - Aziraphale in particular is very afraid, some not very nice things happen/are referenced and it's emotionally demanding for him. As always though, I promise a happy ending. &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>3 weeks to impact</strong>
</p><p>Aziraphale first heard about the asteroid on the six o’clock news. His friend Tracy had invited him around for dinner, and was busy in the kitchen while Aziraphale sat in her rather eclectically-decorated living room complete with doilies, a wide array of mirrors and a genuine crystal ball. Tracy had switched the television on to keep Aziraphale company while she cooked, and when he’d tried to persuade her that he was quite happy to keep <em>her</em> company in the kitchen, she had been insistent that after the week he’d had he needed to just sit down and relax. She wasn’t wrong, Gabriel and his other colleagues had made him feel even worse than usual this week, and so he had been rather grateful for Tracy’s offer. But Aziraphale was feeling quite the <em>opposite</em> of relaxed now after listening to the news report.</p><p>The asteroid was on a direct path towards Earth, and although teams around the world were working on a way to deflect or destroy it, it was uncertain whether they would succeed in time. Aziraphale’s stomach dropped and he found himself thinking about the extinction of the dinosaurs. Perhaps millions of years from now, a new civilisation on Earth would dig up <em>human</em> remains and wonder if they were meant to be some kind of joke planted by their creator that they just hadn’t figured out yet.</p><p>Tracy came into the room a few minutes later, pronouncing that dinner was in the oven and would be ready in half an hour.</p><p>“Have you heard about the asteroid?” Aziraphale asked, hoping for reassurance. He did have a tendency to be overanxious, to fear the worst in almost every situation, to plan out every scenario and encounter in detail before daring to endure the real thing, trying to avoid a negative outcome. Something like this, that was entirely out of his control, made his anxiety even worse. But just because it was <em>possible</em> for an asteroid to wipe out most of the life on Earth, just because it had happened before, that didn’t mean it would actually happen this time, right?</p><p>“Yes, they spotted it a little while ago. Some of my regulars have been contacting me asking if it’s a sign of the end of the world! I keep telling them, I’m not that kind of psychic!”</p><p>“They’ve known for a <em>while</em>? Why didn’t you tell me? Why isn’t everyone talking about this?”</p><p>“Oh, Aziraphale, dear, don’t worry, it’ll be all right. Why don’t I make you a nice cup of tea?”</p><p>“How do you know it’ll be all right?”</p><p>“Well, things always are, aren’t they?”</p><p>“No! They are absolutely not!”</p><p>Tracy pouted at him sympathetically and came to sit beside him on the sofa, looping her arm around his shoulders.</p><p>“They have all sorts of clever technology now, don’t they? It’ll be fine. Why don’t we watch something else that will help you relax?”</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>1 week to impact</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>‘There’s an asteroid on a course for Earth! All life could be wiped out! And yet you think a valuable use of time is belittling me, mocking me, embarrassing me in front of a client? Well, I’ve had enough, Gabriel! I won’t stand for being treated like this anymore!’</em>
</p><p>That’s what Aziraphale <em>wanted</em> to say, but of course, he didn’t. In fact, he hadn’t spoken about the asteroid with anyone except Tracy. None of his colleagues had mentioned it, and none of them were acting any differently. Like Tracy, they clearly believed that everything would be fine, that someone would come up with a miraculous solution to make the asteroid vanish out of the sky. That was typical of people. They were always telling him that he worried too much, but a lot of the time they didn’t seem to worry <em>enough</em>.</p><p>Every day there had been an update about the asteroid in the newspaper Aziraphale had delivered to his home, so he would sit and fret about it over breakfast, making himself anxious before he even set foot in the clinical, cold white offices of the publishing company where he worked. There had been two attempts carried out to deflect the asteroid, but both had failed. The plan now was to blow the thing up, which just made Aziraphale even more anxious.</p><p>
  <em>Won’t the pieces still have to end up somewhere?</em>
</p><p>Aziraphale decided that if this was to be his last week on Earth, he didn’t want to spend it having to look at Sandalphon’s stupid smug face, so he emailed Gabriel asking permission to take a week of annual leave, which Gabriel thankfully approved.</p><p> </p><p>“You know it’s going to be fine, though, don’t you dear? You’ve seen the reports, haven’t you? The spokeswoman from the Government said they were 100% sure that the asteroid would be blown up into such tiny pieces that they’ll just burn up in the atmosphere.”</p><p>“What if she’s just saying that because they don’t want people to panic?”</p><p>Tracy sighed and fetched her smartphone from her handbag, navigating to something and then passing it over to Aziraphale. He squinted, unable to read it without his nifty little glasses, and Tracy chuckled and magnified the text by doing something on the screen with her fingers.</p><p>“It’s an article from Italy and it says exactly the same thing.” She took her phone back from him, but still let him see it, and began scrolling through one of the social media applications. “All of the news outlets in different countries seem to be reporting the same thing. They’ve quoted scientists from all around the world! If it’s a conspiracy to stop people panicking then it’s being orchestrated globally and involves thousands, maybe millions, of people. Does that sound realistic?”</p><p>“Isn’t <em>anyone</em> concerned?”</p><p>“Of course, dear, but it’s going to be fine. You believe me, don’t you?”</p><p>“Well, I do feel a little better now, thank you. Still, I’m glad I booked the week off.”</p><p>“Me too, you deserve a break! How about I call my clients to reschedule and take the week off with you? We could go somewhere! Oh, how about a lovely coach trip up to Oxford! Julia Bentley told me about a deal in the paper.”</p><p>Oxford was a lovely city, and Aziraphale decided there would be worse ways to spend his last week on Earth than with a good friend in a lovely city, so he agreed.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>0 days to impact</strong>
</p><p>Aziraphale and Tracy boarded the coach to head back to London, and he graciously let her take the window seat. They’d had a lovely week away, visiting the castle and the museums, the university and the botanic gardens, and partaking in afternoon tea at a different café every day. Tracy had insisted that Aziraphale refrain from buying the newspaper, but had shown him a few articles on her smartphone throughout the week whenever he got particularly distracted by his anxiety about the asteroid. Today was the day that a rocket carrying a nuclear weapon would be launched, which would be detonated to shatter the asteroid into tiny pieces.</p><p>The radio was playing on the coach, some kind of bebop that Aziraphale didn’t recognise, but this was suddenly interrupted, replaced by an emergency news broadcast.</p><p>
  <em>“The nuclear weapon detonated but did not shatter the asteroid in the pattern predicted by simulations. The asteroid has been broken into smaller pieces, but most of these are too large to burn up in the atmosphere.”</em>
</p><p>Seconds later, a flash of light out of the corner of his eye drew Aziraphale’s attention to the window. Then there was another, and another... followed by a loud boom. The coach shook, the passengers screamed, and then everything went black.</p><p> </p><p>Aziraphale awoke lying on a bed in an unfamiliar room. He pushed his palms down against the mattress to lift himself up, shuffling into a seated position and scanning his eyes around the room. He was apparently alone. The walls were grey and ugly, poorly-maintained, and the room was full of vacant beds covered with white sheets, giving it the appearance of a hospital ward. Aziraphale felt something brush against his wrist and lifted it up, finding a wristband had been attached to him. A hospital wristband, perhaps? Had he been in an accident?</p><p>He thought back and remembered being on the coach with Tracy. There had been an explosion! Aziraphale’s heart plummeted into his stomach. Where was Tracy? Was she here? Was she all right? He jumped up from the bed and headed for the doorway, stepping out into a corridor.</p><p>“Hello? Is anybody there?”</p><p>Aziraphale wandered the corridors for a while on trembling legs, calling out, but wherever he went, he couldn’t find anyone. The place seemed to have been abandoned, but why would they have left him here? His heart was pounding fiercely in his chest and his throat was painfully dry. He needed to work out where he was and what had happened.</p><p>Aziraphale’s ears pricked in response to an unexpected sound, and he paused, willing his heart to stop racing, the rush of his blood in his ears making it difficult to listen to discern whether he was truly alone. Then he heard the sound again, clearer this time. The sound of hushed whispers.</p><p>“Hello?”</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t! He might be infected!”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“He might need help! I’m going to find out!”</em>
</p><p>“Hello? It’s all right, please come out,” Aziraphale called out, his heart and mind both racing as he wondered, infected with <em>what</em>?</p><p>A teenage boy with brown curly hair tipped with golden highlights appeared in one of the doorways off the corridor, lingering there, fear in his bright blue eyes.</p><p>“Ah, hello.”</p><p>“Are you wearing a wristband?” the boy asked, his voice quiet and unsure.</p><p>“Yes,” Aziraphale replied, but there was a hint of a question in it. The wristband! What if it <em>was</em> a hospital wristband, and he was wearing it because he had been infected with whatever the boy had been discussing with whomever else was in that room?</p><p>“What colour is it?”</p><p>Aziraphale rolled up his sleeve and showed the boy his wristband. “Blue.”</p><p>“Oh, thank God!” The boy turned back into the room. “Guys, come on, it’s all right, he’s not infected!”</p><p>Aziraphale breathed the slightest sigh of relief to hear that he wasn’t infected by whatever they were talking about, but his relief was very short-lived. He was still in an unfamiliar place, had no idea where Tracy was, there was some kind of disease he needed to be afraid of, and now, he wondered, as another three teens emerged from the room, was he going to have to look after a group of children as well?</p><p>The four teens, three boys and a girl, were all looking at Aziraphale with relief, like finding him was some kind of miracle, as though he might actually be able to help them. He envied them, having faith like that. Sadly, he knew that whatever was going on, he would have been completely useless looking after <em>himself</em>, let alone a group of kids. Aziraphale had so many questions he didn’t know where to start.</p><p>“I was travelling with a woman called Tracy. She has bright red hair, have you seen her?”</p><p>The kids looked at each other and shook their heads.</p><p>“Where are your parents?”</p><p>“They got infected. They were taken away.”</p><p>“Infected with <em>what</em>?”</p><p>“The virus from the asteroid,” the curly-haired boy offered by way of explanation.</p><p>“It turns people into zombies!” the girl piped up.</p><p>“Actually, it’s impossible for a virus to turn people into zombies,” the boy with glasses added.</p><p>“Yeah, that’s stupid!” the other boy, the tallest of the group, weighed in.</p><p>“It’s not stupid, stupid!”</p><p>“We can argue about this later,” the boy who had first approached Aziraphale suggested, holding up his hands. He seemed to be the leader of their little group. “What’s your name?”</p><p>“Aziraphale.”</p><p>“Hi, Aziraphale. I’m Adam.” The boy held out his hand, and Aziraphale noted the blue wristband he was wearing as he shook it. “This is Pepper, Brian and Wensleydale.”</p><p>“Well, it’s lovely to meet you all, but I really need to find my friend.” Aziraphale decided to try not to think about a virus which had effects a teenager would describe as ‘turning people into zombies’ just for now.</p><p>“We can help you look for her!”</p><p>“Oh... thank you. Can you tell me more about what’s happened? I’m afraid I was in an accident and I don’t remember anything.”</p><p>“Sure,” Adam said, and he even smiled. <em>How can he smile at a time like this?</em></p><p>As they explored the corridors and rooms of the strange building, Aziraphale learned from the kids that on the day the asteroid fragments (“<em>Actually</em>, once they enter the atmosphere they're technically meteors, and when they strike the Earth they become meteorites") hit, people had immediately started getting sick. The ‘zombie’ description seemed to stem from the fact that those infected became unresponsive, unpredictable and sometimes violent. The kids had a theory that the virus was driving them to get close to uninfected people in order to infect them as well, so that the virus could reproduce itself. Aziraphale didn’t know enough about viruses to know whether this was plausible, but it was certainly enough to make him even more terrified.</p><p>Guided by the kids, Aziraphale investigated every room in the building, but there was no sign of Tracy, or anyone else for that matter.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Mr Aziraphale,” Adam said sadly. As they’d explored the building, Aziraphale had kept his eyes open for a phone or a computer, something he might be able to use to contact someone, but he had seen nothing. The rooms seemed to be set up as a makeshift hospital, but a hospital without phones or computers? Had they really needed to set it up that fast?</p><p>
  <em>How long was I unconscious?</em>
</p><p>“Do you know where we are?” Aziraphale asked. He probably should have asked that much earlier, but his head was still spinning.</p><p>“The Airbase.”</p><p>“Airbase?”</p><p>“Tadfield Airbase? It’s American, but they let the Government turn it into a hospital to help deal with all the sick people and the people who were injured when the meteors hit.”</p><p>Aziraphale had heard of Tadfield. It was a village in Oxfordshire. He obviously hadn’t been brought far from where the coach had crashed, so why wasn’t Tracy with him? Aziraphale blinked back tears as he started to fear the worst.</p><p>“Mr Aziraphale? Are you ok?” Brian asked.</p><p>“I need to find my friend,” he croaked in response.</p><p>“We should take you to the wall!” Pepper announced.</p><p>“The wall?”</p><p>“Good idea, Pepper. Yeah, so many people were brought here and got split up from their friends and family that they started writing messages on a wall. We can see if your friend Tracy wrote one for you! Let’s go!”</p><p>The kids raced down the corridor ahead of him until they suddenly seemed to realise he wouldn’t be able to match their pace, and they slowed down and waited for him to catch up. As soon as they pushed open one of the doors leading outside, there was no mistaking that they were, in fact, at an airbase, apparently in the middle of nowhere.</p><p>“It’s this way, come on!”</p><p>Aziraphale did his best to keep up with the kids, but his legs were still wobbly and his body was vibrating with the intensity of each of his rapid heartbeats. Rushing across the tarmac of the airbase would put unnecessary extra pressure on his poor heart. He finally caught up with the kids, who had led him to one of the outer walls of one of the other buildings, which had been covered in what looked like graffiti.</p><p>“Right, Brian, you take the far end, Pepper, you take the next bit, then Wensley, and I’ll start here at this end.”</p><p>The kids split up and spread themselves along the length of the wall, and Aziraphale decided to stay close to Adam. As much as he’d panicked when he’d found himself the unexpected guardian of a group of kids, for now at least, it actually felt more like they were looking after <em>him</em>.</p><p>He read through the messages that had been scrawled on the wall - people’s names, messages for their loved ones, information about where they were heading. After a while, he noticed a pattern. The messages either said ‘we’re going to Scotland’ or ‘we’re going to Wales’.</p><p>“Why do they all say they’re either going to Scotland or Wales?”</p><p>“Those are the safe places,” Adam explained.</p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“The Government set up quarantine zones. If you have a blue wristband you can go into one of the areas where no one has the virus. One of them is in Wales and the other one is in Scotland.”</p><p>“How can they only have two? That seems ridiculous!”</p><p>“They had more. They had a lot more,” Adam explained sadly, his voice dropping so quiet that Aziraphale decided it would be best not to pry for more information, he didn’t want to upset the boy.</p><p>“Adam! Mr Aziraphale! I found something!” Pepper shouted, and Adam immediately rushed over to join her. Aziraphale followed as quickly as his shaky legs would carry him. “Look!”</p><p>
  <em>‘Aziraphale, I don’t know where they’ve taken you, I’ve looked everywhere! They’re telling me I have to go now, but just in case you see this, I’m going with a group of people to Wales. Please follow me if you see this, and don’t worry, everything will be ok. Love Tracy xxx’</em>
</p><p>“She’s ok!” Adam beamed, grabbing hold of Aziraphale’s arm. “So now you just have to go to Wales and find her!”</p><p>Again, Aziraphale’s relief was short-lived. How could he possibly get to Wales? And <em>where</em> in Wales? It wasn’t exactly a tiny place! It seemed unlikely that the kids would be aware of the specifics. Maybe he’d be able to find more information somewhere, perhaps in one of these other messages. But for right now, what was really bothering him was why the kids were still here.</p><p>“If there were groups of people leaving, why didn’t they take you with them?”</p><p>“They took the older people first; they said kids are less likely to get infected so we weren’t a ‘priority’. They said they’d send someone back for us, but no one came.”</p><p>“Are there other children here?”</p><p>“No, everyone else had their parents so they were allowed to go with them.”</p><p>“I’m very sorry about what happened to your parents, Adam.”</p><p>Adam nodded, his eyes glazing with tears. “But you’re going to help take care of us now, right?”</p><p>“I’ll try.”</p><p>“Thanks, Mr Aziraphale! We should take you to Mr Crowley.”</p><p>“Mr Crowley?”</p><p>“He’s the only other grown-up here. He’s in the control room.”</p><p>Aziraphale felt a rush in his abdomen as a wave of relief cascaded over him. There was another adult here! Thank the Lord! He followed the kids across the tarmac to another building, and Brian pushed open the heavy metal door in the corner. They entered a dark room full of computers, but none of them seemed to be operational. Maybe if he could turn them on he could find a way to contact someone?</p><p>“Mr Crowley! We’ve found a man!” Adam called out, and Aziraphale heard a shuffling sound before a man appeared from underneath one of the workstations. Aziraphale’s breath caught in his throat. He was quite possibly the most handsome man Aziraphale had ever seen, and he could almost <em>feel</em> his pupils dilating.</p><p>He knew, he absolutely <em>knew</em> that it was completely insane and inappropriate to be thinking about something like that right now given the circumstances, but he really couldn’t help himself. The man started walking towards him, his slender hips swaying as he moved, and Aziraphale only managed to stare at him with wide eyes. He was dressed in dark colours, with tight black jeans and a dark grey henley with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and his long auburn hair was tied up loosely in a bun at the back of his head, with a few wispy curls escaping from it, framing his face. His eyes drifted down, and Aziraphale realised he was looking for the wristband, so he held it up for him to see.</p><p>“S’ok, I know the kids wouldn’t have brought you here if you were infected,” he said softly. He had a lovely, deep voice with a light Scottish accent. Crowley slowed his approach like a predator not wanting to startle his prey. It was no wonder, Aziraphale probably looked like a rabbit in the headlights. “I’m Crowley.”</p><p>Crowley held out his hand, also with a blue wristband affixed, and Aziraphale took it. Crowley smiled at him, and something wriggly and almost pleasant happened in Aziraphale’s stomach, as though he weren’t in the middle of what felt like the apocalypse.</p><p>“I’m Aziraphale.”</p><p>“Hello Aziraphale, it’s nice to meet you.” Crowley was still speaking slowly and carefully, and hadn’t released his hand. “Come and sit with me for a bit?”</p><p>Aziraphale nodded and allowed Crowley to lead him, releasing his hand but guiding him with a gentle touch on his elbow, to a small circle of five chairs that had been set up in the corner of the control room.</p><p>“What’s your story?” Crowley asked as they sat down across from each other.</p><p>“I don’t really know. I was on a coach going from Oxford to London, with my friend Tracy, and we saw some of the meteors hit the ground, and then I don’t know what happened. I woke up in one of the buildings here, it looked like it had been turned into a hospital, but there was no one else there except for the children. They took me to the wall with all the writing on it. There was a message from my friend Tracy saying that she’d gone to Wales.”</p><p>“Good, I’m glad your friend’s ok.”</p><p>“Me too.”</p><p>“I saw some of the meteors hit too. Came here to get tested. I’m gonna go to Scotland, but I said I’d stay with the kids, didn’t want them left on their own. I’m also waiting for someone.”</p><p>“Oh?” Aziraphale asked, and he had to admit he sounded disappointed, which was completely ridiculous.</p><p>“Yeah, my friend, Anathema. I told her I was coming here to get tested, she was supposed to come and meet me so we could go to Scotland together.”</p><p>“I do hope she’s all right.”</p><p>“Yeah, me too, but she’s a survivor, I’m sure she’ll make it. They were supposed to be sending someone back for me and the kids but that was a couple of days ago, I’m starting to worry that something’s gone wrong. You’re not a computer engineer by any chance, are you?”</p><p>“No, I work in publishing.”</p><p>“Ever published a book about how to repair a load of computers and communications equipment in the control room of an abandoned American Air Force base that was turned into a temporary hospital and housing facility after a load of virus-carrying meteors hit the Earth?”</p><p>“Not that I recall, sorry.”</p><p>Crowley laughed softly. “Well, don’t worry, we’ll figure it out. I think I know enough, and Brian’s been helping me; he’s pretty good with technology.”</p><p>“How old are the children?”</p><p>“Thirteen.”</p><p>“I can’t believe someone thought it would be all right to leave them here alone. You were very kind to stay with them.”</p><p>“It was chaos, Aziraphale. They had to make tough decisions.”</p><p>“Adam said there were other quarantine areas, besides the ones in Wales and Scotland. What happened to them?”</p><p>“Got overrun with infected people, managed to break their way inside. The two that are left have been completely sealed now, the only access is by helicopter.”</p><p>“How do you know all this?”</p><p>“The guards did a briefing for everyone before they started transporting people out. I suppose it was easier to just be honest than to deal with all of the people demanding to go this place or that in England.”</p><p>“I can’t believe I missed all of this. How long ago was the meteor strike?”</p><p>“Three days.”</p><p>“<em>Three days</em>? I thought I’d be hungrier.”</p><p>Crowley laughed, his whole face lighting up and the corners of his eyes crinkling. He really was insanely attractive. Maybe it was a weird consequence of the situation, but Aziraphale had never felt so instantly attracted to someone in his entire life.</p><p>“If you’re thinking about your stomach, that’s a very good sign.”</p><p>“A good sign of what?”</p><p>“Coping with stress.”</p><p>“I wouldn’t say I’m <em>coping</em>.”</p><p>“It’ll be fine, ok?” Crowley said softly, reaching over to touch Aziraphale comfortingly on the arm. “Brian and I will get some of this communications stuff working, and we’ll contact someone and get them to send a helicopter. In the meantime, we do have food. Just military rations though, I’m afraid.”</p><p>Crowley leaned over, dangling himself precariously over the edge of his chair and reaching out for a box, which he pulled towards him. He pulled out a sealed, nondescript plastic packet and tossed it to Aziraphale.</p><p>“You make it sound easy.”</p><p>“It’s not easy, but it’s possible, and we have to stay hopeful, yeah? We’ll figure it out, there’s always a solution. Ok?”</p><p>Aziraphale wasn’t entirely convinced, although there was something very reassuring about Crowley, so he found himself agreeing with him.</p><p>“Ok.”</p><p>“Terrific. Now, do you mind keeping an eye on the kids for me while I keep working on this?”</p><p> </p><p>Out on the tarmac, the boys played a game they called ‘punch tag’, while Pepper stood beside Aziraphale and rolled her eyes, making the occasional comment about adolescent males. Aziraphale wanted to say something to praise her, all of them, for how well they were coping, but it occurred to him that they were probably only just managing to keep themselves distracted from the true horror of their situation, and that to draw their attention to it wouldn’t be very kind.</p><p>Ever since waking up in the ‘hospital’, Aziraphale had been bombarded with one thing after another, first meeting the kids and learning about the virus, then the wall and finding out that Tracy had gone to Wales, and then meeting Crowley... he’d hardly had time to process any of it. Now, watching Adam punch Brian in the arm and run off, he was able to take a moment to let his mind wander, and his first thought was <em>I was right</em>.</p><p>
  <em>I kept saying we should be more concerned about that asteroid! Maybe if the Government had taken it seriously we would have been better prepared! Not that they could have known about the virus, I suppose. How does a virus that can infect humans evolve in space anyway? Why was I left behind? Why didn’t they take me with the other people? Did they forget about me? What would I have done if Crowley and the kids weren’t here?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>They <strong>are</strong> here. It’s all right. I’m not alone, and Crowley seems very... capable. I have food and shelter and company, and Tracy is safe, and I wasn’t infected with this virus, and eventually someone will come and rescue us. I need to stay calm. I just need to get through this.</em>
</p><p>Aziraphale opened up the packet that Crowley had given him and started to eat the contents, which could, if one was being particularly generous, be described as a cereal bar. Adam announced a change of game, but this new game still seemed to involve quite a lot of punching followed by running away. Pepper tutted beside him.</p><p>After the boys had worn themselves out, they all headed back into the control room. Adam headed straight over to a box in the corner and pulled out five bottles of water, handing one each to his friends and to Aziraphale. Aziraphale accepted it gratefully, the cool water helping to soothe his parched throat. He hadn’t thought to ask for water earlier.</p><p>The kids occupied four out of the five chairs in the circle where Aziraphale had sat with Crowley before. Aziraphale felt depleted of the strength he would need to try to put on a brave face for the children, and retreated to the other side of the workstations instead, sinking down onto the floor and resting his head against the wall. He closed his eyes and took a long, deep breath.</p><p>“Hey, you ok?”</p><p>Crowley approached slowly and settled himself on the floor beside him.</p><p>“Not really.”</p><p>“I know it’s a lot to take in, but it’s going to be ok.”</p><p>“That’s what everyone kept saying about the asteroid though, wasn’t it?”</p><p>Crowley made a contemplative sort of noise at the back of his throat. “I guess, but let’s just focus on one thing at a time, ok? We just need to concentrate on finding a way to contact someone. Everything else can wait.”</p><p>The sound of the children’s laughter echoed through the control room and Crowley smiled.</p><p>“How are they coping so well?”</p><p>“We do what we have to do. The human mind is more resilient than you think.”</p><p>“Mine isn’t. I’m sorry, Crowley.”</p><p>“What are you sorry for?”</p><p>“Out of all the people you could have had stuck with you here, you’ve ended up with a completely useless nervous wreck.”</p><p>“Don’t be so hard on yourself, this whole situation is extreme, anyone would be anxious.”</p><p>“Yes, but it’s not just the situation. I’m always a mess.”</p><p>“I’m sure you’re stronger than you know,” Crowley said softly, stroking his hand reassuringly up and down Aziraphale’s arm.</p><p>“I’m not,” Aziraphale choked out before succumbing to the tears he’d been trying so hard to hold back, his resolve crumbling in response to Crowley’s affectionate gesture. “I’m hopeless.”</p><p>“No, you’re not.”</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Crowley. The last thing you need is someone else to take care of.”</p><p>“Aziraphale, listen to me. Everything’s going to be fine. You can do this, I know you can.”</p><p>“You don’t know me.”</p><p>“Well then, let’s get to know each other, yeah? Why don’t you tell me about yourself?”</p><p>“You’re just trying to distract me.”</p><p>“Yes, I am. You can’t do anything about the situation right now so a distraction might be a good idea, don’t you think? I know I could use a break, I’ve been working on trying to fix the radio all day.”</p><p>“You’re right, I’m sorry. You’ve been working so hard and here I am just feeling sorry for myself. I really appreciate everything you’re doing. Thank you.”</p><p>“You’re welcome. So, help me out with a bit of distraction?” he asked lightly, and somehow Aziraphale found the corners of his mouth twitching into a smile, and he wiped away his tears. He sniffed and nodded.</p><p>“What do you want to know?”</p><p>“Anything. Where do you live?”</p><p>“London.”</p><p>“Do you like it?”</p><p>“I do. There’s plenty to keep me busy.”</p><p>“What do you like to do?”</p><p>Crowley was leaning towards him, listening attentively with a sweet smile on his face that made him look even more ridiculously attractive. The sight summoned another wave of tears, and Aziraphale sobbed as quietly as possible, not wanting to alarm the teens.</p><p>“Aziraphale...” Crowley squeezed his shoulder, but it just made him cry even more. “Would you like to find out more about me instead?” Crowley offered, and Aziraphale nodded and then pressed his hands to his face.</p><p>“Well, I mostly live in London too, but I was travelling up this way for work. I’ve got a <em>gorgeous</em> car, a 1934 Bentley, ninety years old and not a scratch! She’s my most treasured possession, but I do also have a pretty impressive collection of houseplants in my flat. I can’t know for sure, but I’d put money on them being the most lush and verdant in all of London, and do you want to know how I get them to look so good?”</p><p>Aziraphale waited a moment to see whether the question was rhetorical, but when Crowley didn’t continue, he moved his hands away from his face and nodded to encourage him.</p><p>“I discipline them.”</p><p>“What?” Aziraphale croaked, licking away the salty tears that had tracked down his face.</p><p>“I discipline them. I let them know what will happen if they disappoint me. You’ve heard of talking to plants to help them grow, right? Well, trust me, shouting at them is much more effective. I let them think I’m leaving the room, and then I turn back around and shout, ‘<em>Grow better</em>!’”</p><p>Crowley did indeed shout those last two words, presumably as a demonstration, prompting the kids to use profanities that Aziraphale was rather shocked to hear coming from the mouths of teenagers.</p><p>“Well now, there really is no need for that kind of language!” he chastised, hoping his voice would carry to the opposite side of the control room. Apparently it did, as the kids started giggling nervously.</p><p>“Sorry, Mr Aziraphale!” Adam shouted back.</p><p>Crowley started laughing, and Aziraphale couldn’t help it, he found himself chuckling too. His laughter was so incongruous with his internal emotional state that it seemed inappropriate, and he quickly controlled it. Still, Crowley had indeed managed to distract him, to give him a brief reprieve from the horror of his current situation.</p><p>Crowley winked at him, and Aziraphale experienced a jolt down the length of his spine and could feel his cheeks flushing in response. Thankfully, the control room was quite dark, so hopefully Crowley wouldn’t notice. Aziraphale was struck by a strange sensation then, and wondered whether there was something more to the intense attraction he felt towards Crowley. It was almost like recognition.</p><p>“You seem so familiar to me. Have we... have we met before?”</p><p>Aziraphale cringed internally. As soon as the words left his mouth he realised it sounded like a clichéd attempt at a pick-up line, and where would he possibly have met someone like Crowley?</p><p>“I’m sure I’d remember meeting you.”</p><p>“Because I’m such a mess, you mean?”</p><p>Crowley sighed and shook his head. “No, that’s not what I mean.”</p><p>Aziraphale dipped his head and cleared his throat, and decided it would be best to deflect the conversation back to the previous topic.</p><p>“So, what else do you like to do? Besides shouting at poor innocent plants, I mean?” Aziraphale asked lightly, and Crowley smirked.</p><p>“I like causing trouble. Playing tricks on people.”</p><p>Aziraphale laughed breathlessly and shook his head, assuming that Crowley was joking, but Crowley tilted his head and fixed him with a serious expression. “You don’t. Not really?”</p><p>“Yep.”</p><p>Aziraphale furrowed his brow in confusion and Crowley laughed again. It was a joyous sound that Aziraphale didn’t think he could ever get tired of hearing, and he found himself wishing he’d had the privilege of meeting Crowley under much better circumstances.</p><p>“Hey, it’s ok! Don’t look at me like that! I’m a <em>magician</em>.”</p><p>“Oh. Oh! How wonderful! What sort of magic do you do?”</p><p>“A little bit of everything, really.”</p><p>Aziraphale loved magic, and started to wonder if that was why he might have recognised Crowley. Maybe he’d seen him perform before? But he couldn’t place him, and he was fairly certain that he would remember a show that someone like <em>Crowley</em> had performed <em>very</em> clearly.</p><p>“That must be so much fun! I actually always wanted to perform magic myself.”</p><p>“Really?”</p><p>“Ever since I was a little boy, yes, but I never actually did it.”</p><p>“Why not?”</p><p>“The same reason I haven’t done most of the things I’ve wanted to, I was too afraid. Afraid of making mistakes, afraid of it all going wrong. And now I find myself thinking, isn’t fear supposed to protect us? What has <em>my</em> fear protected me from? I hate my job, and rather than doing something I wanted and having it go wrong, I’ve just not done it at all.” Aziraphale felt suddenly self-conscious and stared down into his lap. “Nothing like a ‘zombie apocalypse’ to make you evaluate your life’s choices, is there?”</p><p>“It’s never too late to take a different path.”</p><p>“Well now, that’s just not true, and if I’m being completely honest,” Aziraphale lowered his voice then to make sure the teens didn’t hear him, “this feels rather like the end of the world.”</p><p>“It’s not. We’re still here. Dum spiro spero.”</p><p>“While I breathe, I hope.”</p><p>“Exactly. I’m not ready to give up yet. We can do this!”</p><p>“Yes, all right. We can do this.”</p><p>Crowley grinned and clapped him on the shoulder, and Aziraphale’s chest bloomed with warmth.</p><p>“Right, well, now that I’ve actually made you smile,” Crowley began, and Aziraphale touched his hand to face as if inspecting to see whether he <em>was</em> actually smiling, “I’m going to get back to fixing this radio. If you want some company, the kids aren’t bad, they’re pretty smart really.”</p><p>“Thank you. I think I’d like to sit alone at the moment, but just for a little while.”</p><p>“Of course, take all the time you need.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Courage</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Once the sun set, Crowley gave up on trying to fix the radio and came to sit with Aziraphale and the kids. They’d added an extra chair to the circle for Aziraphale, and the six of them entertained themselves by talking to each other about all sorts of random topics. Adam seemed to be something of a young environmentalist, telling Aziraphale all about how the rainforests were being cleared so that people could get cheap hamburgers, and how the whales were being hunted for no reason. Aziraphale got the impression from glancing around at the others that this was something they’d heard before, so with Adam’s impassioned speech being apparently for <em>his</em> benefit, he made an effort to show his interest, although in the back of his mind he wondered how much of humanity would be left after all of this anyway. Maybe the whales and the rainforests would come back on their own.</p>
<p>Crowley was sat next to Aziraphale, and every time his arm accidentally brushed up against Aziraphale’s, or their knees bumped together, Aziraphale felt a shiver of excitement, which was taking more and more concentration to try to ignore. The more Aziraphale got to know about Crowley, the more and more attractive he became in Aziraphale’s eyes. He was amazing with the kids, and so upbeat and positive, with a sneaky streak perhaps befitting a professional magician. Aziraphale was very tempted to ask Crowley if he could do a magic trick for the five of them there and then, using things he could find in the control room, but apprehension crept up his spine as he feared that Crowley might, having learnt of his own interest in magic, ask him to reciprocate.</p>
<p>The kids started getting tired, and Crowley explained that their sleeping bags were set up in the building just across the tarmac, the one with the wall decorated with graffiti, including Tracy’s message.</p>
<p>“I’ll just see them safely to bed and then I’ll come back, ok? Unless you want to go to sleep now too?”</p>
<p>In all honesty, Aziraphale was exhausted, but the prospect of spending time alone with Crowley was far too tempting, and his mind was racing anyway, making getting a decent amount of sleep unlikely.</p>
<p>“I don’t think I could sleep yet.”</p>
<p>“Ok. I’ll be back soon.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale wished the kids pleasant dreams, for what that was worth, and then they left with Crowley, who lit the way using a torch. When the door closed behind them, Aziraphale was overwhelmed by the penetrating silence in the control room. It was oppressive, as though it had a weight to it, pressing down on him and making him tremble.</p>
<p>
  <em>Please hurry back.</em>
</p>
<p>Aziraphale scrubbed at his face, brushing aside the tears that had begun to spill, trying to compose himself before Crowley returned. But his attempts were futile. He cried for all of the people who had already been infected by the virus. He cried for the children’s parents. He cried because even though he hadn’t been infected, it felt like his life was over, and he’d never done any of the things he really wanted to do. He hadn’t even travelled. He so badly wanted to see Rome and Paris but he hadn’t even travelled to the continent, because he was <em>alone</em>, and he hadn’t wanted to go alone. He’d spent most of his life alone.</p>
<p>The sound of the door squeaking open disrupted Aziraphale’s thoughts and he rubbed his eyes and tried to settle his breathing.</p>
<p>“Hey. How are you doing?”</p>
<p>“Not very well, I’m afraid,” Aziraphale mumbled, his voice tired and broken.</p>
<p>“The kids were saying how much they like you just now. They’re really glad they found you, and not just because they were sick of being stuck with my grumpy arse for company. You’ve really helped them to feel better today. You’re a calming presence.”</p>
<p>“You can’t be serious? I’m a walking bundle of anxiety.”</p>
<p>“Not with them. You’re great with them. They seem reassured now that you’re here.”</p>
<p>“Well, I suppose that’s something. Thank you.”</p>
<p>“I made a lot of progress on the radio today; I wouldn’t be surprised if we managed to contact someone tomorrow.”</p>
<p>“Oh, I do hope so. I need to get to Tracy, and I’m sure she’s worried about me.”</p>
<p>“It won’t be long now.”</p>
<p>“You’re not coming to Wales, are you? You’re going to take the children to Scotland?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, my family’s all up there.” Aziraphale’s chin drooped down to his chest. “Don’t worry, when I manage to contact someone, I’ll make sure they know that you need to go to Wales, to your friend. You don’t need to come with us.”</p>
<p>That wasn’t what Aziraphale had been concerned about, but he managed to nod and express his gratitude regardless.</p>
<p>“What made you decide to move to England?”</p>
<p>“Just more work opportunities. I go back home quite a bit though, sometimes take my niece and nephew all the way up to Inverness to watch the dolphins.”</p>
<p>“That sounds nice.”</p>
<p>“It really is. Scotland’s gorgeous, and the dolphins come right up close to the shore.”</p>
<p>Realising that he had never even been to <em>Scotland</em>, the dull weight in Aziraphale’s chest grew even heavier.</p>
<p>“Well, maybe one day when this is all over, I’ll go to Scotland and see the dolphins.”</p>
<p>“Something to look forward to,” Crowley said with a smile.</p>
<p>They sat up for about an hour talking. Crowley asked about Aziraphale’s work, and Aziraphale confessed the difficulties he had standing up to Gabriel and Sandalphon, and then found himself now just praying that he would have the <em>chance</em> to do so again, even if he did end up chickening out of it and hiding in the toilets to have a cry. But Crowley was so sympathetic and supportive, Aziraphale started to seriously question why he hadn’t been able to say what he wanted to say to Gabriel. He could have. He was capable of opening his mouth and saying those words. He thought maybe if he <em>did</em> ever have chance, this time he might actually do it.</p>
<p>After a while, Aziraphale couldn’t restrain himself from yawning, and Crowley suggested they go to bed. He flicked on the torch and they left the control room, crossing the tarmac to the other building.</p>
<p>“I’ve set out a sleeping bag for you, it’s right next to mine. I’ll turn the torch off before we go inside so we don’t wake the kids, but just stick close to me and I’ll lead you to it, ok?”</p>
<p>“All right.”</p>
<p>Crowley carefully picked up Aziraphale’s hand and rested it on his forearm before switching off the torch. Aziraphale squeezed Crowley’s arm gently and shuffled along quietly next to him when they entered the dark building. After a short distance, Crowley moved his arm away, and Aziraphale experienced a prickle of apprehension for a second until he felt Crowley’s hands settle on his shoulders.</p>
<p>“The sleeping bag is right next to you,” he whispered close to Aziraphale’s ear, making him shiver. “Just crouch down, you’ll feel it.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale began to lower himself to the ground, and Crowley’s hands remained on his shoulders until he whispered back, “I’ve got it,” when his hand came into contact with the smooth, synthetic material of the sleeping bag. Aziraphale took off his shoes and then felt around to locate the opening of the sleeping bag, wriggling his way inside. It wouldn’t be particularly comfortable to sleep in his clothes, but he supposed there were much more important issues to worry about right now. He took off his bowtie and extricated his arm from the sleeping bag to place it on the ground beside him before undoing the top two buttons of his shirt. As far as comfort went, that would have to do.</p>
<p>He could hear Crowley shuffling around a bit getting into his own sleeping bag just to his left. Despite everything, it was immensely reassuring to know that Crowley would be close by throughout the night.</p>
<p>“Goodnight, Aziraphale,” he whispered.</p>
<p>“Sleep well, my dear.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Aziraphale only achieved a few hours of broken sleep, and was already awake when he heard the sound of the door being pushed open and something thudding against it, presumably to prop it open. Daylight streamed in through the doorway, illuminating Brian, who then disappeared outside. Aziraphale turned to his side and found Crowley still lying in his sleeping bag, his hair now loose and completely dishevelled, the soft red curls fluffed up from being rubbed against the pillow. He smiled, and Aziraphale swallowed his heart back down.</p>
<p>“Morning,” Crowley mumbled, his voice rough with sleep.</p>
<p>“Good morning.”</p>
<p>Crowley swept a hand through his hair, and Aziraphale inhaled deeply. This was ridiculous. A ‘<em>zombie apocalypse</em>’, and here he was drooling over an attractive man as though <em>he</em> were one of the teenagers at this airbase. Maybe it was just his brain’s way of trying to cope with the situation. Perhaps it had simply created this distraction as a way of trying to alleviate some of the stress. After all, Aziraphale’s mind had a proven passion for self-preservation, to the extent that it tortured him more trying to keep him out of harm’s way than he would have suffered had he actually endured the harm of which he was afraid.</p>
<p>“Did you sleep?”</p>
<p>“A bit. Did you?”</p>
<p>“Yeeeeah, not bad.” Crowley’s sleeping bag lifted up as he arched his back and stretched his arms above his head. Aziraphale’s pulse quickened, almost prompting a bout of sardonic laughter that he just barely managed to contain. “Right then, breakfast?” Crowley announced cheerfully, and Aziraphale smiled and nodded. The kids were obviously awake too, Aziraphale could hear them moving around, and before long, the six of them were sat in their circle of chairs, feasting on another delight from the selection of military rations.</p>
<p>“How is it?” Crowley asked, sounding extremely sceptical that he would receive an enthusiastic response. Aziraphale closed his eyes and hummed with satisfaction.</p>
<p>“Scrumptious!”</p>
<p>Crowley and the kids all laughed, and although Aziraphale’s heart swelled to know that he had managed to bring a brief moment of humour into the darkness of their situation, he still dipped his head and brought his hand up to his chest self-consciously. That’s when he realised he hadn’t fixed his shirt and put his bowtie back on, but, well, perhaps the current situation warranted relaxing his standards.</p>
<p>After breakfast, Crowley and Brian went back to working on the radio, and Aziraphale went with the other teens for a walk around the airbase. There was an eerie sort of quiet to it, a place that would have once been bustling with activity, now abandoned and desolate. Aziraphale let the kids choose their route, lost in his own thoughts about his life so far, and what his life would look like in the future, assuming he did in fact survive this. One thing was for sure, his life would never quite be the same again. The advice he had read so many times, that one should not wait, because the chance might never come again, echoed in his mind. ‘<em>There’s always tomorrow</em>’... but one day there won’t be.</p>
<p>When they got back to the control room, Crowley beckoned them over to the workstation where he was sitting.</p>
<p>“Good timing! I think we’re nearly there!”</p>
<p>“You’ve managed to repair the radio?” Aziraphale asked, experiencing a rush of hopefulness.</p>
<p>“We think so. Hang on...”</p>
<p>Crowley fiddled around with some of the knobs and dials in front of him and then picked up the radio handset.</p>
<p>“Ok everyone, here we go.” Crowley turned on the radio. “This is Tadfield Airbase, is anyone receiving this message? Come in, please. Over.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale’s heart leapt up into his throat and he clenched his fists at his sides, praying for a voice to emerge through the static being emitted from the speakers. Crowley waited for a while and then repeated his message.</p>
<p>“Maybe there’s no one there!” Wensleydale cried, huddling up closer to Aziraphale’s side. Aziraphale put his hand on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.</p>
<p>“It might take them a little while to respond,” he murmured reassuringly, making sure his voice didn’t betray the fact his stomach was tying itself into knots. Crowley repeated the message a third time, but the static continued. Wensleydale looked like he was about to cry, so Aziraphale wrapped his arm around him.</p>
<p>“Tadfield Airbase? This is the Norton Checkpoint, what’s your status? Over.”</p>
<p>The teenagers whooped and cheered and Aziraphale let out a shuddering breath, overwhelmed with relief. Crowley grinned, and then pressed the button to speak into the radio again. When he did so, the radio emitted a spark and the sound of static abruptly stopped.</p>
<p>“Shit!”</p>
<p>“What’s wrong?”</p>
<p>Aziraphale tried to stay calm (well, <em>relatively</em> calm), telling himself that someone had responded to the message, which meant someone knew they were here, and so they were bound to send help even without further communication. Weren’t they?</p>
<p>“I don’t know. Brian, hand me the screwdriver, would you?”</p>
<p>Brian grabbed the screwdriver and passed it to Crowley, and he opened up the radio. He showed it to Brian, who nodded, as if he understood what was going on. Aziraphale wished he knew even the slightest thing about electronics.</p>
<p>“It’s ok, one of the components has blown, but I can replace it. Brian, take the others with you and go to the secondary control room, find me another one of these, ok?”</p>
<p>“Will do.”</p>
<p>Crowley handed Brian the screwdriver and Brian encouraged the other kids to follow him outside. Aziraphale looked at Crowley with wide eyes.</p>
<p>“It’s ok, Aziraphale. I’ll have this fixed in no time.”</p>
<p>“You’re very clever. How did you learn how to do all this?”</p>
<p>Crowley chuckled. “That’s a long story; I’ll tell you when we get out of here.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale was about to suggest that Crowley might as well tell him now while they waited for the kids to come back (although he had no idea how far away this ‘secondary control room’ was) when the kids burst back into the room, panting for breath as though they’d just been running.</p>
<p>“Mr Crowley! There’s someone at the gate!”</p>
<p>Crowley locked eyes with Aziraphale for a second and then set down the radio, leaping out of his chair and racing to the door. Aziraphale and the kids followed him outside, Aziraphale clutching his hand to his ribs and breathing heavily as they reached the gate. The kids were right, there was a van parked outside, and as soon as Crowley approached the gate, the driver hopped out, a young woman with thick round glasses and long, flowing dark hair.</p>
<p>“Anathema!”</p>
<p>“Crowley!”</p>
<p><em>Anathema</em>, that was the name of Crowley’s friend who he’d said he was waiting for. Crowley was absolutely beaming at her as she approached, and Aziraphale couldn’t help but smile.</p>
<p>“Mr Crowley! Her wrist! Look!” Pepper shouted, and Aziraphale followed Crowley’s gaze to Anathema’s wrist, a red wristband wrapped around it. “Red means she’s infected!”</p>
<p>“I’m not infected!” Anathema protested, but the kids backed away from the gate. “They tested me in this stupid pop-up testing centre. They tried to detain me but I got away. Crowley, that was two days ago! If I was infected don’t you think I’d have symptoms by now?”</p>
<p>“Actually,” Wensleydale piped up, “I heard that young people can carry the virus and infect other people without actually getting sick themselves.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale froze for a moment and then took a step back from the gate.</p>
<p>“Crowley, please! I’m <em>not</em> infected! Please help me, I’m really scared! Please don’t leave me on my own!”</p>
<p>“It’s ok, Anathema. Wait there, I’ll come out to you!”</p>
<p>Aziraphale’s stomach lurched. “Crowley, you can’t!”</p>
<p>Crowley approached him and grabbed hold of his arms, looking him intently in the eye. “Aziraphale, listen to me. She’s my friend, I can’t leave her alone.”</p>
<p>“Crowley, please...”</p>
<p>“I won’t let her in here, I can’t risk you or the kids, but I can’t just leave her out there on her own. I’ll go with her, we can take the van, try and find somewhere safe.”</p>
<p>“But you won’t be able to get into one of the quarantine centres! You said they were closed to road traffic! And even if you could get there, they’ll never let you in if they think she’s infected! And what if she <em>can</em> pass on the virus to you?”</p>
<p>“Aziraphale, it’s ok, it’ll be ok. I’ll be fine, and so will you. Get Brian to fix the radio, he knows what to do, then call for help, and take the kids with you to Wales, ok?”</p>
<p>“Crowley, I can’t...” Aziraphale sobbed, tears streaming down his cheeks.</p>
<p>“Yes, you <em>can</em>. You’re stronger than you know. You can do this.”</p>
<p>“I can’t.”</p>
<p>“You <em>can</em>.” Aziraphale broke down in tears and reached out for Crowley, enclosing him in a crushing hug. “It’s all going to be ok. You can do this, I know you can.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale squeezed Crowley tightly, his heart aching more than he had ever known.</p>
<p>
  <em>Please don’t leave me. Don’t go. Please. I can’t do this without you.</em>
</p>
<p>Crowley stepped back, and Aziraphale scrubbed his hands across his face. Crowley turned to the kids.</p>
<p>“Take care of each other, ok? Maybe we’ll see each other again when this is all over, eh?”</p>
<p>The kids all crowded around Crowley in a group hug, and Aziraphale looked on helplessly, his heart tearing itself in two in his chest.</p>
<p>“We can go dolphin-watching in Inverness,” Crowley said softly, looking at Aziraphale now. Aziraphale knew it would never happen, but he nodded sadly, pressing his lips together hard to try to suppress his sobs.</p>
<p>Crowley waved goodbye and pressed the button to open the gate. He rushed out and embraced Anathema, rubbing his hands up and down over her back. Anathema’s arms came up and looped around Crowley, and Aziraphale’s eyes fixed on that red wristband, now pressed up against Crowley’s neck. Crowley waved again, and the kids waved back. All of them were crying. Aziraphale managed a small, sad wave, and then, moments later, Anathema had started the van, turned it around, and they drove off out of sight.</p>
<p>“Pepper, close the gate please,” Aziraphale croaked. Pepper bounded over to the button Crowley had pressed and pushed down on it, but nothing happened. The other kids looked at each other and rushed over to her, taking it in turns to try to get the button to work, but still the gate remained open. Aziraphale forced himself to keep breathing. “Right, well, that’s not a problem, we’re in the middle of nowhere, it’ll be fine. Let’s all go and get that component for the radio so that we can call Norton again, all right?”</p>
<p>The kids didn’t move, their eyes glazed with tears.</p>
<p>“Do you think Mr Crowley will be all right?”</p>
<p>“I hope so, Brian. Come on, let’s get this radio working again.”</p>
<p>The five of them trudged across the tarmac. Adam had his arm looped around Wensleydale, who was crying openly, and Aziraphale could hear occasional sniffles from the other children as well. Aziraphale was completely dazed and numb, his mind silent for once, his awareness limited to the sound of his shoes hitting the tarmac with each step and the muffled cries of the children.</p>
<p>Brian did apparently know what he was looking for, and managed to extract the component they needed from some kind of device in the secondary control room. Aziraphale was impressed by how well he was able to concentrate given the circumstances. They headed back to what the kids were referring to as ‘base camp’, and Brian got to work swapping out the blown component for the new one. Wensleydale wrapped his arms around Aziraphale.</p>
<p>“I miss Mr Crowley.”</p>
<p>“I know, I miss him too. It’ll be all right.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale took a deep breath, trying to put all of his unhelpful thoughts aside just for now. He just needed to contact Norton Checkpoint on the radio, ask them to send a helicopter, and then he and the kids would get into the helicopter, and they would be taken to Wales, and he would find Tracy, and everything would be ok again. Well, not everything, but he could worry as much as he wanted once he got there. For now, he just needed to focus on getting himself and the kids to safety.</p>
<p>“Ok, done!” Brian announced, and Aziraphale sat down at the workstation, dread creeping over him as he picked up the radio and assumed the position Crowley had taken less than an hour ago. Aziraphale was normally terrified even making a simple phone call, writing down what he wanted to say on a piece of paper before he’d even pick up the phone. Now, his hands trembled as he switched on the radio.</p>
<p>“This is Tadfield Airbase calling Norton Checkpoint, are you receiving this message please?”</p>
<p>“Say over,” Brian whispered.</p>
<p>“Over.”</p>
<p>The static emerged from the speakers again, and Aziraphale held his breath.</p>
<p>“Tadfield this is Norton, we lost your signal earlier. What’s your status?”</p>
<p>“There are five of us here, myself and four children. Someone was supposed to come back to take us to Wales but they haven’t arrived, are you able to arrange for a helicopter please?” A pointed look from Brian made Aziraphale add, “Over.”</p>
<p>“Have you all been tested for the virus? Over.”</p>
<p>“Yes, we’ve all been tested; we’re all wearing blue wristbands. Over.”</p>
<p>“Ok, Tadfield, we can dispatch a helicopter to your location. Stand by for further information. Norton out.”</p>
<p>The kids cheered and clapped and hugged Brian and told him he was a genius, with an added profanity for emphasis. Aziraphale didn’t pull them up on their bad language. Crowley had found it funny when he’d done that before, but Crowley wasn’t here now, and the chances of ever seeing him again were infinitesimal.</p>
<p>“All right everyone, we’ll leave the radio on, and let’s just sit down for a bit while we wait for them to get back to us, all right? How about some water? Let’s drink some water.”</p>
<p>They all sat down in the circle, the empty chair painfully conspicuous, and Adam handed bottles of water around the group.</p>
<p>
  <em>It’s going to be fine. It’s going to be fine. I can’t let the kids see me fall apart, they’ve already lost their parents, and now Crowley... <strong>Breathe</strong>.</em>
</p>
<p>They all sat in silence, slowly sipping their water, until eventually a voice materialised on the radio.</p>
<p>“This is Norton Checkpoint calling Tadfield Airbase. Over.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale jumped up from his seat and rushed over to the radio.</p>
<p>“This is Tadfield Airbase. Over.”</p>
<p>“We’ve dispatched a helicopter to you, it will be with you in about five minutes. Head outside so that the pilot can land near to your location. Over.”</p>
<p>“Understood! Thank you so much!”</p>
<p>Aziraphale was too relieved to worry about forgetting to say ‘over’.</p>
<p>“Best of luck to all of you. Norton out.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale set down the radio and let out a long sigh before turning to the children.</p>
<p>“Right, is there anything here you need to take with you? How about a bottle of water and one of the ration packets to eat on the journey? Is there anything else you need?”</p>
<p>“I don’t think so Mr Aziraphale.”</p>
<p>“All right, well then go and choose something to eat from the box and then we’ll head outside.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale picked up one of the ration packets and bottles of water for himself as well before leading the children outside, but he dropped them onto the ground in shock as soon as he stepped onto the tarmac. They were no longer alone. There were people crossing the tarmac towards them.</p>
<p>“Zombies!” Pepper shouted. Aziraphale froze. Pepper’s debatable choice of description notwithstanding, these people were clearly infected with the virus, their movements jerky and erratic. Aziraphale’s heart began pounding so hard and fast beneath his sternum that his body pulsed violently with it and he felt like he might explode.</p>
<p>Aziraphale’s mind raced. He could take the children back inside but then how would the helicopter find them? Would the helicopter even land if there were infected people nearby? How close did you have to get to someone to actually contract this virus?</p>
<p>Aziraphale’s mind flashed up an image of Crowley hugging Anathema, but he set it aside. As he was trying to work out what to do, the helicopter appeared in the sky and Aziraphale panted for breath, the conflicting emotions of relief and terror threatening to overwhelm him.</p>
<p>“Come on, we have to go a little way out onto the tarmac so they can see us!”</p>
<p>“But the zombies!” Brian protested.</p>
<p>“It’s all right, those people are far enough away, they can’t make you sick, it’ll be fine.”</p>
<p>“Actually, they could kill us,” Wensleydale added unhelpfully.</p>
<p>“Come on, it’s all right.” Aziraphale ushered the children out onto the tarmac, his legs trembling. “Wave to the helicopter, all of you.”</p>
<p>The children followed Aziraphale’s instruction, and he waved too, tears of joy filling his eyes as the helicopter set down a safe distance away from the buildings. It was all going to be fine. If they ran, they would easily get there before the infected people got too close.</p>
<p>“Go!” Aziraphale instructed the children, and they all started to run. Aziraphale ignored the sharp pain in his side and kept running until he heard a cry from behind him, and turned to see Wensleydale on the ground. “Keep going!” he shouted to the other three kids, and he turned back to help Wensleydale.</p>
<p>“Come on, it’s all right,” Aziraphale said gently, trying to conceal the panic in his voice. He held his hand out to help the boy stand up.</p>
<p>“Look!” the boy cried, pointing towards the helicopter. Brian, Pepper and Adam had boarded it safely, but the infected people were getting much closer now. Aziraphale wasn’t sure they would make it in time. The helicopter pilot apparently felt the same way, as the helicopter took off, and Aziraphale’s heart sank.</p>
<p>
  <em>Are they going to leave without us?</em>
</p>
<p>“Are they leaving without us?” Wensleydale cried desperately.</p>
<p>“No, no, of course not. They just need to move the helicopter to somewhere safe.”</p>
<p>Then, one of the infected people looked right at Aziraphale and something shifted in their expression. They broke out into a run towards Aziraphale and the boy.</p>
<p>“We have to get back inside! Come on!”</p>
<p>Aziraphale wrapped his arm around Wensleydale and ushered him back in the direction they’d come, trying to match his running pace to the boy’s. Back in the relative safety of the control room, Aziraphale pulled the door closed and panted for breath, his mind racing trying to work out what to do.</p>
<p>“I’m so sorry, Mr Aziraphale! I’m so sorry I fell!”</p>
<p>“Shhh... it’s not your fault.”</p>
<p>“The zombies are going to get us, aren’t they?”</p>
<p>“We’ll be safe in here.”</p>
<p>“But then how are we going to get to the helicopter?” Aziraphale suddenly felt a wave of clarity sweep everything aside in his mind as he formulated a plan. “Actually, we should barricade the door!” Wensleydale continued, rushing to the other side of the room and starting to push a heavy box across the floor. “Then, maybe eventually they’ll just leave? And then we can go back outside? And we can call someone on the radio and then maybe they can send another helicopter?”</p>
<p>“Wensleydale, stop pushing the box, it’s all right. Come here for me would you, please?”</p>
<p>Wensleydale approached with a confused expression on his face, and Aziraphale took hold of his arms, just like Crowley had done with him.</p>
<p>“I’m getting you onto that helicopter with your friends. Listen carefully, all right? I want you to climb up on my shoulders. Then I’ll open the door, and you need to duck your head down until we get outside, and then I’m going to run towards an empty space where the helicopter will be able to pick you up. If it’s not safe for them to land, I’m going to lift you up, and you’re going to have to grab onto the helicopter, all right?”</p>
<p>“But Mr Aziraphale...”</p>
<p>“Wensleydale, we don’t have a lot of time. You can do this, all right?”</p>
<p>“But what about you?”</p>
<p>“I will do everything I can to get on that helicopter with you. Come on now, climb up on my shoulders.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale crouched down, and the boy did as he had instructed. Aziraphale then opened the door, half expecting to be immediately ambushed by infected people, but instead, they were hanging around where the helicopter had taken off. He could hear the helicopter circling, and craned his neck to identify its location. There was an area not far away that looked clear, so Aziraphale began to run in that direction, hoping the helicopter would follow. There was a blood-curdling shriek, and he turned to find three of the infected people running towards them. Aziraphale picked up his pace, summoning every last ounce of strength that he had to keep going. As they got closer to the area where he had intended for the helicopter to set down, another group of infected people appeared around the corner of one of the buildings and started rushing towards them.</p>
<p>“They’re going to get us!”</p>
<p>“Remember what I said!” Aziraphale shouted, the helicopter getting closer to the ground but hovering above it rather than landing. A red rope was lowered out through the open helicopter door.</p>
<p>Aziraphale could hear the rapid thud of footsteps closing on them from multiple directions, so close now that even the chopping sound of the helicopter blades couldn’t drown them out. Aziraphale had no idea whether he was going to make it, but he was determined that Wensleydale would so that he could grow up and become a chartered accountant and absolutely love it, and have many, many happy days with his friends.</p>
<p>“Grab hold of the rope!” Aziraphale shouted as he reached the helicopter, grabbing hold of Wensleydale’s feet and pushing him upwards with the kind of strength only adrenaline could provide. Wensleydale grabbed hold of the rope, the helicopter took off, and Aziraphale felt a pressure on his back and then his forehead before everything went black.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Choices</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Special thanks to Oniria_Creation and KissMyAsthma for help with this chapter! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Aziraphale regained consciousness, he found himself once again lying on a bed. He opened his eyes and noticed a figure in his peripheral vision, so he turned his head towards it.</p>
<p>Crowley.</p>
<p><em>Anthony</em> Crowley.</p>
<p>“Oh, <em>fuck</em>!”</p>
<p>Aziraphale bolted upright and Anthony snorted out a laugh, bringing his hand up to cover his mouth.</p>
<p>“We can bleep that out,” Anthony chuckled in his decidedly <em>English</em> accent, making eye contact with someone across the room. Aziraphale followed his gaze towards the camera operator in the corner. “Hello, Aziraphale. You remember who I am now?”</p>
<p>“Yes,” Aziraphale croaked, his eyes filling with tears that he couldn’t possibly hope to contain.</p>
<p>“You applied to be on my show.”</p>
<p>“Yes,” he choked out, nodding emphatically to reinforce the word that had emerged as little more than a broken sob. All of his memories were slotting back into place, and he brought his hands up to cover his face as he cried, overwhelmed with emotion. Anthony sat on the edge of the bed beside him and rubbed his hand soothingly up and down his arm.</p>
<p>“You said you were struggling with your confidence; you thought that maybe I could help you.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale squeezed his eyes closed and nodded, unable to speak now.</p>
<p>“And I really wanted to work with you, Aziraphale.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale released a shuddering breath and wiped his eyes, trying to control his tears so that he would be able to speak.</p>
<p>“How are you feeling?”</p>
<p>“I feel really good,” he managed, drawing deep breaths now, and Anthony pulled him into a hug.</p>
<p>
  <em>Oh God, oh God, Anthony Crowley is hugging me, Anthony Crowley is hugging me, Anthony Crowley <strong>already</strong> hugged me, oh God, no wonder I was so attracted to him!</em>
</p>
<p>Aziraphale had, in fact, had a rather sizeable crush on the extremely charismatic magician and hypnotist Anthony Crowley since the very first time he’d seen his TV show. He wondered whether that sense of recognition he’d had at the airbase was something that wasn’t meant to happen, but maybe Anthony hadn’t taken into account quite how powerful Aziraphale’s feelings might be. Aziraphale hoped that Anthony didn’t realise he had a crush on him at all, but unfortunately that was extremely unlikely.</p>
<p>
  <em>Oh, no wonder I was so worried he’d be able to tell I was attracted to him! On some level I must have known that he notices <strong>everything</strong>!</em>
</p>
<p>Anthony looked now just as he normally did on television, wearing an impeccably-tailored black suit, his hair now short, one section of it flopping over his forehead. Aziraphale had always loved that strand of hair that always refused to stay in place with the rest of Anthony’s style, breaking free little by little as each show went on. The long curls had obviously been a wig, but Anthony had looked absolutely stunning with long hair too.</p>
<p>“You were incredible,” Anthony murmured near his ear, and Aziraphale was actually quite grateful that he’d been crying, at least it would serve to disguise the way his breathing hitched in response. Anthony pulled back slightly but kept his arms wrapped around Aziraphale, holding him steady, and Aziraphale clutched at the back of Anthony’s suit jacket.</p>
<p>“I’ve removed all of the suggestions I put in your mind, you’re completely back to normal now. I want you to know that I only made you forget about the show and who I was, and I suggested that you wouldn’t want to talk to anyone but Tracy about the asteroid, but that’s all. Everything you did out there, that was <em>you</em>, it had nothing to do with me.”</p>
<p>Anthony hugged Aziraphale again, and Aziraphale nodded against his shoulder. He could hardly believe what he’d just done, but he knew that Anthony was right. He hadn’t felt any different from normal; Anthony had just put him in a situation where he would be able to prove to himself that he could face his fears. And he had.</p>
<p>Aziraphale thought back over everything that he had forgotten through the power of Anthony’s suggestion. He remembered meeting with him, feeling so nervous that his heart had climbed up into his throat and he’d had to clutch his hands tightly together in his lap to try to stop them from shaking. He remembered the two of them talking about what would happen, and praying that he wouldn’t break down, that he would actually have the strength to face his fears, just as Anthony believed he could.</p>
<p>He remembered carefully reading and signing a very lengthy contract. He remembered the extremely thorough psychological evaluation, which he was actually reassured to have passed. It was quite encouraging to know that a professional thought he could endure what he was about to be put through and not completely fall apart. He remembered the also extremely thorough physical medical examination, which he had also passed with flying colours. He remembered how determined he had been to make the most of this incredible opportunity, for this to be a turning point, the start of a whole new way of life.</p>
<p>“Are you ok?”</p>
<p>“I’m more than ok. I feel like I could do anything.”</p>
<p>“You can. You do anything you want; you just need to believe in yourself.”</p>
<p>“Thank you.” Aziraphale committed the feeling of hugging <em>Anthony Crowley</em> to memory and then released him.</p>
<p>“There’s someone here who’d like to see you.”</p>
<p>The door opened, and Tracy came in, grinning like crazy. Aziraphale jumped up from the bed and rushed over to her, letting himself be pulled into a crushing hug. His love for her was the same as it had always been, but he encouraged himself to <em>notice</em> it more. That’s what he wanted moving forward, to pay more attention to all of the good feelings that <em>deserved</em> his attention, to express gratitude for them every single day, and to know that no matter how anxious he felt, if he really wanted to do something, then he would go for it. The barriers that had prevented him from doing so in the past were all of his own making. If he could sprint across a runway with a teenager on his shoulders while being chased by zombies, he could surely get on the Eurostar and visit the Eiffel Tower and stop by a lovely little creperie after. In fact, he was rather looking forward to it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>Six months after the not-pocalypse</strong>
</p>
<p>“You wanted to do this because you felt like you needed more confidence. Did it work?”</p>
<p>“Absolutely. It was the most amazing experience of my life, so far anyway! When I went home, it was like the first day of the rest of my life. I mean, when you survive an apocalypse, it inevitably affects you,” Aziraphale joked, and the interviewer laughed. He was an enthusiastic young man whose hairstyle was reminiscent of bunny ears, who had introduced himself as Eric.</p>
<p>“So what’s changed in your life?”</p>
<p>“Well, the biggest change happened when I went back into work. I was... I suppose the best word for it would be <em>assertive</em>. I was no longer willing to tolerate the way my boss and my colleagues had been treating me. I didn’t stay there for long, I’d realised that I hadn’t been doing what I wanted with my life and I wasn’t willing to do that for much longer. In my spare time, I started doing some research, and after a few months I handed in a letter of resignation, and I devoted my time to something I’d always dreamed of doing.”</p>
<p>“Magic?”</p>
<p>“Actually, I opened up an antique bookshop.”</p>
<p>“Oh wow, really?”</p>
<p>“Yes, it had always appealed to me, but I’d never felt able to take the risk of setting up my own business, and I was afraid of having that kind of responsibility, having to know how to do everything myself, having no one else to defer to.”</p>
<p>“But that’s changed?”</p>
<p>“Well, I started to see that along with the responsibility came <em>autonomy</em>, and that was very appealing, and that I didn’t <em>need</em> to know how to do everything myself. I can call upon experts in different aspects, marketing, finance and so on, when I need them.”</p>
<p>“And how’s it going?”</p>
<p>“Well, it’s early days, I only opened the shop a couple of months ago, but I’m thoroughly enjoying myself. I’m so much happier.”</p>
<p>“So, you’re not planning to become a magician, then?”</p>
<p>“Actually, I have been practising and putting a little show together. If I can find a venue locally to perform then I’d love to do it, even if it’s just the once to have the experience.”</p>
<p>“I’ll be the first in line for a ticket!”</p>
<p>“Thank you, that’s very kind of you, my dear. If no one else comes, I’m afraid I might have to rely on you quite heavily to volunteer to assist me.”</p>
<p>Eric chuckled. “That’s ok, I play guinea pig for Crowley often enough. So, the show obviously hasn’t been broadcast yet, but have you spoken to anyone about your experiences in the ‘zombie apocalypse’?”</p>
<p>“Yes, I’ve spoken to my friends and family about it. They were surprised to say the least that I would put myself through something like that, although I hope what people will take from that is that if you want to change something for the better, that’s enough to make it happen. Deciding that you’re not content to keep limiting yourself is the most important step towards creating the life you want.”</p>
<p>“I bet they were proud of you?”</p>
<p>“Yes, although some of them asked me, ‘don’t you think on some level you knew there was nothing really to be afraid of, and that’s why you were able to do what you did?’, and I’ve told them that I’m not sure, but my fear was certainly very real. That’s the point, I think. Fear is important, it helps us to evaluate risk and keep ourselves safe. My problem was being afraid when I had no good reason to be. It was crippling me, keeping me from doing the things I wanted to do. That doesn’t happen anymore. I’m still me, I still feel the same, and I still worry more than I should, but I don’t let it control me now. I’m so grateful to Anthony. This experience completely changed my life.”</p>
<p>“That’s great, thank you, Aziraphale, we’ve got everything we need now. Thanks for coming in.”</p>
<p>Eric stood up, so Aziraphale did the same, and they shook hands.</p>
<p>“We’ll edit bits of that together to put at the end of the show. It’s due to broadcast in September.”</p>
<p>“Wonderful, thank you.”</p>
<p>“Are you ok to stick around for a bit? Crowley was hoping to see you before you left.”</p>
<p>“Oh. Yes, of course.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale sat back down and his heart started racing. He let out a self-deprecating, breathless laugh. It was quite funny really. He’d finally stood up to Gabriel and Sandalphon, he’d taken a huge risk and sold the property he’d inherited in order to buy the bookshop, he was actually going to get up on a stage somewhere and perform <em>magic</em>, which would almost certainly go wrong, and he hadn’t let his feelings of anxiety hold him back. As the months had passed, those feelings had begun to lessen slightly, as if his anxiety was starting to learn that he wasn’t going to pay attention to it, and therefore it might as well sometimes not bother. Still, the thought of seeing Anthony Crowley again made him feel incredibly nervous, but perhaps that was inevitable, after all, Aziraphale had admired him and his work for a long time.</p>
<p>“Aziraphale! Hey, how are you doing?”</p>
<p>Anthony sauntered confidently into the room and came to stand in front of him, holding his hand out. Aziraphale wondered whether he should stand, or whether he should offer his hand while seated, and then quickly rationalised that it really didn’t matter, and simply reached up to shake Anthony’s hand.</p>
<p>Anthony smiled and sat in the chair across from him, where Eric had been sat to conduct the interview. Aziraphale clasped his hands loosely together in his lap. That was progress. The first time he’d ever sat with Anthony he’d squeezed his hands together so tightly his knuckles had turned white.</p>
<p>“I’m doing very well, thank you. How are you?”</p>
<p>“I’m terrific. It’s great to see you! I heard your interview, I’m so glad you got what you wanted out of the experience.”</p>
<p>“Thank you, so am I. I really appreciate you choosing me for this.”</p>
<p>“Your application really stood out to me. I could tell how good you were, I mean, truly, genuinely good, through and through. There are bad people out there doing all sorts, hurting other people, never giving it a second thought, and then there was you, being nothing but kind and generous but struggling so much. I really wanted to try to help you.”</p>
<p>“Well, I’m very grateful.”</p>
<p>“It was my pleasure, I’m really grateful to you for taking part!” Anthony smiled, and it was infectious. “So, Eric told you the show will broadcast in September, but we’ll send you a preview copy probably about a month before so that you can see it before anyone else does. Just don’t share it online or anything,” Anthony added, as if Aziraphale would even know how to do such a thing.</p>
<p>“That sounds wonderful, thank you. I’m looking forward to seeing it.”</p>
<p>“Great! Well, I suppose I’d better let you go. Oh, but one more thing.” Anthony pulled a card out of the tight pocket of his jeans and handed it over to him. Aziraphale looked at it quizzically. “My agent, Bee. They’re... well, if I’m being completely honest they can be a pain in the arse, but they’re the best agent I’ve ever had. Wait until the show broadcasts and then give them a call, they’ll find you a brilliant venue for your magic show.”</p>
<p>“Oh, thank you, Anthony!”</p>
<p>“Call me Crowley, all my friends do,” he said with a smile. Aziraphale wondered whether that meant that <em>Crowley</em> considered him a friend.</p>
<p>“All right. Are you sure your agent would want to hear from <em>me</em> if they normally represent people like <em>you</em>?”</p>
<p>“Definitely. People are going to absolutely fall in love with you, Aziraphale.”</p>
<p>
  
  
</p>
<p>
  <strong>Nine months after the not-pocalypse</strong>
</p>
<p>Tracy handed Aziraphale a steaming mug of tea and then settled down beside him, picking up the remote and pressing play. Aziraphale had been sent a copy of ‘Anthony Crowley: Zombie Apocalypse’ on DVD, and his heart was racing with excitement at the prospect of finally seeing it.</p>
<p>“How would you react if you woke up alone in a strange place?” Crowley narrated over footage of Aziraphale waking up in the ‘hospital’, looking very confused.</p>
<p>
  <em>“Hello? Is anybody there?”</em>
</p>
<p>“And found out about a new virus that was turning people into... zombies?”</p>
<p>
  <em>“The virus from the asteroid.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“It turns people into zombies!”</em>
</p>
<p>“Would you be strong enough to face your fears?”</p>
<p>
  <em>“Go!”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“Are they leaving without us?”</em>
</p>
<p>“This... is Zombie Apocalypse.”</p>
<p>The footage that was shown next was just of Aziraphale going about his daily life. They had recorded this before the apocalypse experience began. Crowley’s team had had him walk through St James’s Park and sit having a cup of tea and cake in one of his favourite cafés.</p>
<p>“This is Aziraphale Fell, a 47-year-old publishing executive from London. He enjoys old books, baking and fine dining. Aziraphale applied to be on the show because he was struggling with anxiety and a lack of confidence.”</p>
<p>It then cut to the interview Aziraphale had done with Crowley before the experience had happened.</p>
<p>
  <em>“I know it’s holding me back, it’s been holding me back my whole life. I’m getting older now and I don’t want to look back at the end of my life and realise I never did any of the things I really wanted just because I was afraid to.”</em>
</p>
<p>“So, Aziraphale has agreed to be placed in the middle of a zombie apocalypse to force him to face his fears and prove to himself that he’s stronger and more capable than he thinks he is.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale watched with great interest as Crowley hypnotised him, his skin prickling with a phantom touch as he watched Crowley place his hand gently on his shoulder.</p>
<p>“I’ll be playing a role in this scenario as well, but of course, Aziraphale won’t remember who I am, or anything about applying to take part. Of course, if we want Aziraphale to really believe there’s a virus going around that turns people into zombies, we need somewhere for that virus to come from. That’s where Tracy comes in. She’s Aziraphale’s best friend and she’s going to be helping us.”</p>
<p>It cut to footage of Crowley and Tracy sitting together in Tracy’s living room, where Aziraphale was sitting with her right now.</p>
<p>
  <em>“Tell me about Aziraphale.”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“Oh, he’s such a sweetheart. The kindest, most generous person I’ve ever met. He does struggle with his anxiety, the poor dear. He could certainly do with finding the courage to stand up to some of the people he works with. I hate to see how disappointed he gets with himself when he lets his anxiety stop him from doing what he wants. He really deserves to be happy.”</em>
</p>
<p>Aziraphale turned to Tracy and smiled gratefully, and she squeezed his arm.</p>
<p>“Tracy has agreed to let us mess about with her television and phone, so that we’ll be able to show Aziraphale some fake news reports to make him believe there is an asteroid heading for Earth. Thankfully, Aziraphale is the only person in the whole of the United Kingdom that doesn’t own a smartphone, so that makes my life a bit easier.”</p>
<p>“Cheek!” Tracy objected on his behalf, making Aziraphale laugh.</p>
<p>“I’m also making some... <em>modifications</em> to Aziraphale’s daily newspaper.”</p>
<p>Some footage of Aziraphale watching the initial news broadcast about the asteroid was shown, then him talking to Tracy about it, and then weeks later when Tracy showed him the articles on her phone.</p>
<p>“Of course, I can’t risk Aziraphale talking to anyone else about the asteroid, but he’s going to find himself not <em>wanting</em> to talk about it with anyone but Tracy. He’s also going to decide to book the week off work.”</p>
<p>It cut back to Crowley carrying out this part of the hypnosis, and Aziraphale’s heart fluttered as he watched Crowley leaning in close to him, murmuring suggestions in that soft, low voice of his. They’d discussed all of this before it happened, but of course Aziraphale didn’t actually remember the hypnosis part, and so being able to see it happen was exhilarating.</p>
<p>“We need Aziraphale to be somewhere we can control when our fake asteroid hits, so we’re sending him on a trip to Oxford with Tracy. We’ll let him have a week of fun before the apocalypse comes.”</p>
<p>It then showed Aziraphale and Tracy boarding the coach, the radio broadcast, and the explosions that Crowley explained they had rigged. On the footage, Aziraphale could see Crowley sitting at the back of the coach, and at the right moment, he stood up, approached Aziraphale and put him into a hypnotic trance, his head falling back against the headrest.</p>
<p>“This is Tadfield Airbase, a disused American Air Force base that will be the perfect setting for our fake apocalypse. Aziraphale is currently here,” Crowley explained as a red dot flashed over one of the buildings on the aerial view, “let’s see what happens when he wakes up.”</p>
<p>Crowley stopped narrating for a while, and Aziraphale was now just watching footage of himself waking up and trying to work out where he was. He looked just as afraid as he remembered feeling. The footage showed him getting up off the bed, exploring the corridors, and then eventually finding the ‘children’.</p>
<p>“These ‘kids’ are actually first year drama students from the University of West London, but we’ve managed to make them look a bit younger. I want Aziraphale to feel a sense of responsibility for the children, to realise that they might be relying on him.”</p>
<p>The scenario continued. Aziraphale and the teens searched for Tracy, and then visited the wall to find Tracy’s message, before finally heading to the control room, where Aziraphale would meet Crowley.</p>
<p>“So, complete with a pretty stylish wig and a hopefully passable Scottish accent, I’m going to be joining the scenario. Aziraphale is going to be feeling pretty relieved now to realise he’s not the only adult on the base, particularly because I’m going to be playing something of a leadership role. But ultimately, that’s something I want Aziraphale to take over.”</p>
<p>
  <em>“I find myself thinking, isn’t fear supposed to protect us? What has my fear protected me from? I hate my job, and rather than doing something I wanted and having it go wrong, I’ve just not done it at all.”</em>
</p>
<p>“The thought of the apocalypse is already making Aziraphale reflect on his life. I need him to realise that he’s capable of doing anything, that he doesn’t need to be limited by fear.”</p>
<p>The scenario continued to play out, and eventually the ‘children’ disappeared off to bed.</p>
<p>“The students are now sneaking off to their nice comfortable beds for the night. It’s only me and Aziraphale who will be enjoying the luxury of sleeping bags on the hard floor of an old US Air Force building.”</p>
<p>“Oh! I didn’t realise the youngsters had sneaked off somewhere!” Aziraphale told Tracy. “That’s very clever!”</p>
<p>“It’s day two, and today, Aziraphale’s ability to face his fears will really be tested.”</p>
<p>
  <em>“How is it?”</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>“Scrumptious!”</em>
</p>
<p>“I’m thrilled to see Aziraphale trying to make the children laugh despite all of the stress he’s under. This shows that he already feels somewhat responsible for their wellbeing, which will be really important as our scenario plays out. Right, let’s give Aziraphale a bit of hope. It’s time to get the radio working.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale could see the relief on his own face when the response came through over the radio.</p>
<p>“What Aziraphale doesn’t realise is that one of our technicians, Newt, has rigged the radio to stop working as soon as we receive a response. The response is, of course, being broadcast from our production tent just around the corner.”</p>
<p>The scenario continued, and when it got to the part where Crowley was speaking to Anathema through the gate, Aziraphale’s heart rate picked up in response to the memory. He had been <em>devastated</em> when Crowley had left, but had admired his sacrifice, the risk he had been willing to take for his friend.</p>
<p>“I need Aziraphale to realise that he’s a strong, capable leader, and so I need to take myself out of the scenario to let him step into that role. Oh, and I might have asked Newt to tamper with the gate as well. Never mind, it’s not like there are any <em>zombies</em> running around to worry about, right?”</p>
<p>Anathema drove the van around the corner, and she and Crowley got out, heading into what was presumably the production tent. It was full of a whole team of people, and monitors showing the images from the hidden cameras that were set up all around the airbase. Crowley sat down at one of the workstations and put on a pair of headphones, before it switched back to showing footage of Aziraphale with the teens.</p>
<p>“I’m so proud of Aziraphale. He’s obviously anxious but he’s immediately taken charge of the situation and he’s doing a great job. So, time to increase the stakes. It wouldn’t be much of a zombie apocalypse if we didn’t have any zombies, would it? So I’ve drafted in some more students from the University of West London.”</p>
<p>It was so strange to watch everything play out on television. They’d edited the footage and added dramatic music, which was enough to get Aziraphale’s heart racing even though he knew what was going to happen. The music became even more intense when Wensleydale fell and Aziraphale went back for him, retreating into the safety of the control room. It cut back to Crowley in the production tent, speaking to the actor playing Wensleydale through an earpiece.</p>
<p>
  <em>“Great stuff, Jeremy. Suggest to Aziraphale that you barricade the door and hide in there for a while. We’re going to get the zombies to back off a bit in about fifteen minutes. I want you to start getting more and more scared and upset, really blaming yourself for what happened, then tell him you’re too scared to go outside.”</em>
</p>
<p>“I want Aziraphale to see someone else being held back from something they desperately want by their fear. Often we find it much easier to believe in others than we do to believe in ourselves. I’m hoping that Aziraphale will comfort and reassure Wensleydale, and feel a great sense of pride and confidence when they ultimately face their fears together.”</p>
<p>
  <em>“I’m getting you onto that helicopter with your friends. Listen carefully, all right? I want you to climb up on my shoulders.”</em>
</p>
<p><em>“Oh my God...”</em> Crowley whispered. <em>“He’s going to go back out there! Ok, Jeremy, do what he says, and can we bring the helicopter back around please?”</em></p>
<p>Crowley was watching Aziraphale and Wensleydale on one of the monitors with wide eyes. He looked completely shocked and brought a hand up to cover his mouth. Whatever Crowley said next was bleeped out, but his eyes were shimmering as if he might actually cry.</p>
<p>“Look how proud he is of you!” Tracy said sweetly, wrapping her arm around Aziraphale and giving him a gentle squeeze. Aziraphale’s heart felt like it was being squeezed too.</p>
<p>
  <em>“Ok, Jeremy, we’ll do this like we planned, but we’ll keep the zombies in closer. We’ll still lower the rope from the helicopter for you to grab onto, but I won’t be on board, I’ll approach Aziraphale on the ground.”</em>
</p>
<p>Aziraphale watched himself step out onto the tarmac with Wensleydale on his shoulders.</p>
<p>“This is above and beyond anything I expected Aziraphale to do. He must know his own chances of making it onto the helicopter himself are slim, but he’s willing to take the risk, to face his fears to get Wensleydale to safety. I can only hope that after this experience he will afford <em>himself</em> the same compassion, facing his own fears to get where he wants to go in life.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale watched as he ran faster than he had ever run in his life and lifted the boy, who he now knew was <em>eighteen</em> years of age, up above his shoulders. He could hardly believe he had ever possessed such strength. Then Crowley ran up behind him, touching one hand to his back and the other to his forehead, sending him back into a hypnotic trance.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>Three years after the not-pocalypse</strong>
</p>
<p>“Animals!” Aziraphale complained.</p>
<p>“Animals don’t put used coffee spoons in the sugar bowl, only humans do that.”</p>
<p>“Crowley!”</p>
<p>Aziraphale spun around, a beaming smile on his face, and Crowley grinned at him, opening up his arms and enveloping him in a hug. Crowley rested his head against Aziraphale’s and held onto him for longer than the average hug, and Aziraphale relished the feel of his warm, slender body pressed up against his.</p>
<p>“It’s so good to see you!” Aziraphale gushed. They hadn’t seen each other since Aziraphale had filmed that interview for the Zombie Apocalypse show, two and a half years ago.</p>
<p>“You too! How are you?”</p>
<p>“I’m absolutely tickety-boo, thank you, and yourself?”</p>
<p>“I’m great. All the better for seeing you.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale could feel his cheeks heating in response to the compliment, and knew it was pointless to try to hide his reaction from Crowley. Aziraphale made himself a cup of tea, deciding to forego the sugar, while Crowley made himself a coffee. This was the first time Bee had hosted a get-together for their ‘talent’, and Aziraphale had found himself desperately hoping that Crowley would attend.</p>
<p>“Want to sit and catch up for a bit?” Crowley asked, and Aziraphale smiled and nodded, following Crowley over to an empty table in the corner of the hotel’s function room. “I saw your show, by the way. Amazing!”</p>
<p>“Oh... thank you.” Aziraphale was definitely blushing now.</p>
<p>“The way you weaved the magic into the story, and all the twists and surprises... I was literally on the edge of my seat!”</p>
<p>“You’re just being nice.”</p>
<p>“You’re still so humble,” Crowley said softly, looking at him like he admired him and making Aziraphale squirm. “I told you that everyone would fall in love with you when they saw the show. I was right.”</p>
<p>“Well, I don’t know about that.”</p>
<p>“Your sell-out tour suggests I <em>am</em> right,” Crowley chuckled, “but I love that you’ve never let it go to your head. Is it everything you hoped?”</p>
<p>“Oh yes, I love it, I’ve been having so much fun! I love having the chance to be really creative, to try to do something different from what people have seen before. Thank you so much for everything you did to help me, giving me the confidence to perform magic and putting me in touch with Bee.”</p>
<p>“I’m so happy for you,” Crowley beamed, and Aziraphale could tell that he really meant it. “There’s actually something Bee wanted me to talk to you about.”</p>
<p>“Oh?”</p>
<p>“They’ve been approached by someone looking for a host for an awards ceremony. Apparently this person asked Bee for both of us.”</p>
<p>“<em>Both</em> of us? You mean they want us to work together?”</p>
<p>“Yep. What do you think?”</p>
<p>“I... I don’t know. I’m surprised. Why would they want <em>me</em> there if they could just have you?”</p>
<p>“Well, firstly, you clearly have no idea how good you actually are, but even ignoring that, I’ve lost count of the number of times people have asked me if you and I were ever going to perform together.”</p>
<p>“I’ve been asked that too.”</p>
<p>“People always want to talk to me about you.”</p>
<p>“Oh, I’m sorry.”</p>
<p>“Don’t be,” Crowley smiled. “I don’t mind at all. I think they like that I got it wrong with you.”</p>
<p>“What do you mean?”</p>
<p>“I used to have a reputation for being pretty arrogant, like I thought I was infallible. It’s not true, but watching my stuff back I can see where that came from, and people don’t see all the disasters that get edited out, do they?”</p>
<p>“Quite.” Aziraphale had had his fair share of things going wrong during his performances. It actually happening had indeed turned out to be far less worrisome than the <em>thought</em> of it happening used to be.</p>
<p>“In the show, you were supposed to just hide in the control room with the kid until it was safer, I never expected you to go back outside with all the zombies close by. I was so impressed. It was incredible. <em>You</em> are incredible. You really touched people’s hearts.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale squeezed his eyes closed for a moment and turned away. “Crowley...”</p>
<p>“Sorry. It’s true though. So what do you think? Will you do this awards ceremony with me?”</p>
<p>“Yes. I’d like that.”</p>
<p>“Terrific.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>Four and a half years after the not-pocalypse</strong>
</p>
<p>Aziraphale would never have imagined that one day, not only would he become <em>friends</em> with Anthony Crowley, but that the two of them would end up working together. By blending their skills, they’d created a style of performance that was really impressive and unique, and the public’s appetite for what they were producing didn’t seem to be waning at all.</p>
<p>While preparing for the awards ceremony they had hosted over a year ago, Aziraphale and Crowley had spent a great deal of time together, and, thankfully, Aziraphale’s ridiculous crush had faded as he had really got to know Crowley and had become his friend. He supposed he’d just been a little starstruck before. But after the awards ceremony had happened, they had continued to see each other regularly, going out for coffee and cake, or dinner, or working on other performances together, and even coming to watch each other perform live. Aziraphale’s silly crush had not re-emerged, but something else had happened. He’d fallen in love.</p>
<p>As always, he analysed his feelings and the entire situation in tremendous detail. He imagined the various ways he might confess his feelings to Crowley. He imagined <em>not</em> confessing his feelings to Crowley. He imagined what might happen if he told Crowley how he felt and Crowley reciprocated his feelings. He imagined what might happen if he didn’t. Simply having the confidence to overcome his anxiety and to travel to Paris and Rome, to get up on stage and perform, and to tell Gabriel, who had called him ‘sunshine’ in a patronising voice for years, that he could take his job and shove it where the sun <em>didn’t</em> shine (well, perhaps not in those exact words), hadn’t changed who Aziraphale was at heart. He was still considerate and careful. He took risks, but only when to do so was absolutely the right thing to do, when the risk was low, or the reward was something that was so important to him that his life would feel incomplete if he never went for it, even if things didn’t work out.</p>
<p>He decided that <em>that</em> was the important consideration with this decision. What he potentially had to lose by <em>not</em> telling Crowley was much worse than what he might lose by telling him. So, today was the day. He was going around to Crowley’s flat for dinner, and they were going to work on a new show that they were developing.</p>
<p>Aziraphale wasn’t able to finish his meal, his nerves suppressing his appetite, and he could see that Crowley was concerned, presumably because Aziraphale not finishing a meal was something he’d never seen before.</p>
<p>“You all right?”</p>
<p>“I’m fine. I’ve just got something on my mind.”</p>
<p>“Want to talk about it?”</p>
<p>“Well... I...” Aziraphale’s heart was pounding in his chest. Somehow this was harder than all of the other things he’d done. What if Crowley didn’t want anything to do with him anymore?</p>
<p>
  <em>Then I’ll be fine. It would be perfectly reasonable for him to feel that way, and it would be disappointing but it wouldn’t mean that I did the wrong thing by telling him how I feel. Something doesn’t become the wrong decision just because it doesn’t work out how one hopes, and not talking about my feelings isn’t going to make them any less real.</em>
</p>
<p>“Aziraphale?”</p>
<p>Aziraphale hesitated, and ended up confessing to something else that was worrying him that he’d intended to speak to Crowley about later while they were working.</p>
<p>“The idea that you sent me for the new show... I’m a bit concerned. You’re not going to be able to breathe for long underwater.”</p>
<p>“I won’t need to. The tank won’t be <em>completely</em> full of water; I’ll come to the surface.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale tried not to get too distracted by the mental image of Crowley wearing a sleek, tight black wetsuit.</p>
<p>“But you called it ‘The Dolphin’.”</p>
<p>“Yeah?”</p>
<p>“Fish breathe underwater.”</p>
<p>“Y--... yeah?” Crowley squinted at him. “Wait. You don’t... you don’t think dolphins are fish, do you?”</p>
<p>“Well what else would they be?”</p>
<p>“They’re <em>mammals</em>!” Crowley threw his head back and laughed, and Aziraphale huffed indignantly.</p>
<p>“Well, excuse me, but not all of us have science degrees. I studied English Literature.”</p>
<p>“I don’t think you can attribute me knowing that dolphins are mammals to my <em>Botanical</em> Science degree! Haven’t you ever seen Blue Planet?”</p>
<p>“No.”</p>
<p>“Right, then before we do any work tonight I’m making you watch it!” Crowley was still chuckling to himself as he cleared their plates away and then ushered Aziraphale into the living room. “You didn’t think a <em>whale</em> was a fish, right?”</p>
<p>“Possibly.”</p>
<p>“A hundred thousand kilos of sushi.”</p>
<p>“All right, stop it. I’m sure I know lots of things that you don’t know. I bet you’ve never even <em>seen</em> a performance of Shakespeare’s Hamlet.”</p>
<p>“Ugh, no. I prefer the funny ones.” Crowley picked up the remote control and navigated to Blue Planet II on BBC iPlayer. “Did you think a <em>seal</em> was a fish?”</p>
<p>“No.”</p>
<p>“Somehow that makes it even worse.”</p>
<p>“Shh it’s starting, and apparently I have a lot to learn.”</p>
<p>Crowley nudged him with his elbow and leaned in close to whisper, “What about a walrus?”</p>
<p>Aziraphale tensed and his heart starting beating faster, all of his earlier nerves returning. After this. He’d tell Crowley after they watched this.</p>
<p>“Obviously not.”</p>
<p>“Imagine a walrus with gills!”</p>
<p>“I’d rather not.”</p>
<p>Crowley snorted with laughter and settled himself into a sprawl across the sofa. Aziraphale inhaled deeply and fixed his eyes on the screen, trying to concentrate.</p>
<p>“Oh, I love this bit!” Crowley announced excitedly, gripping Aziraphale’s arm. “Watch this!”</p>
<p>Aziraphale listened to Sir David Attenborough talking about the tusk fish, which was trying to break open a mussel using the rough edge inside a bowl-shaped coral.</p>
<p>
  <em>“So here is a fish that uses tools. Some fish are much cleverer than you might suppose.”</em>
</p>
<p>“Yeah, like <em>dolphins</em>,” Crowley sniggered, then took a quick look at Aziraphale and burst into laughter at his own joke, lowering his feet back down to the floor and folding forward, cradling his head in his hands, his whole body trembling as he laughed. When he finally managed to compose himself, he sat back up and wiped his eyes, turning to face Aziraphale again, his lips pressed hard together and quirking into a smile, like he was still struggling to suppress his laughter.</p>
<p>Aziraphale stared at him, completely overwhelmed with love, feeling as though his chest might burst from it. Crowley’s expression became serious, his brow furrowing and his eyes flickering over Aziraphale’s face.</p>
<p>“Are you all right?”</p>
<p>“I have feelings for you,” Aziraphale blurted out. Crowley’s mouth hung open and he seemed to stop breathing for a second.</p>
<p>“Oh. Wow. Ok. Um... me too.” Crowley swallowed and took a deep breath. “I have feelings for you too.”</p>
<p>Apparently Crowley wasn’t the only one who had stopped breathing. Aziraphale sucked in a shuddering breath and willed his hands to stop shaking. Crowley grabbed the remote and paused the programme.</p>
<p>“Are these feelings that you want to... you know... act on?” Crowley asked, and he sounded nervous too. Aziraphale just wanted to throw his arms around him.</p>
<p>“Yes. If you do.”</p>
<p>“Yeah. Yes. Absolutely.”</p>
<p>“May I hold you?”</p>
<p>“You never have to ask me that.” Crowley wrapped his arms around Aziraphale and pulled him close. Aziraphale let out a long breath, releasing all of his nervousness, smiling against Crowley’s shoulder as he enjoyed the incomparable feeling of facing his fears and having it work out how he’d hoped. “I’ve never met anyone like you,” Crowley murmured softly near his ear.</p>
<p>“Neither have I.”</p>
<p>"Unless you have any objections, I don't think I'm going to want to let you go for quite a while."</p>
<p>"Me neither."</p>
<p>"Want to lie down?"</p>
<p>“Yes please.”</p>
<p>Without ever fully letting go of each other, they lifted their legs up and stretched out over the length of the sofa, wrapped up in each other’s arms. They lay there for quite a while indeed, Aziraphale resting his head on Crowley’s chest and listening to his heartbeat, just quietly absorbing the feeling of being with Crowley in this new way.</p>
<p>"You wanna roll over and watch the rest of Blue Planet?" Crowley suggested, then Aziraphale felt him press a soft kiss to the top of his head, filling him with a sense of warmth and comfort.</p>
<p>“That’s a marvellous idea.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale rolled onto his other side, his back now pressed against Crowley’s chest, and Crowley kept one arm securely wrapped around him as he rummaged around for the remote. The show began playing again, and Aziraphale snuggled back against Crowley, watching the beautiful, tranquil underwater scenes, feeling more content than he had ever felt before.</p>
<p>"Oh, orcas!" Aziraphale announced excitedly.</p>
<p>"You know what <em>those</em> are, right?" Crowley teased, and even though Aziraphale knew Crowley couldn't see him, he rolled his eyes. He was obviously <em>supposed</em> to say mammals, but he cleverly avoided it.</p>
<p>"They’re <em>whales</em>."</p>
<p>"Actually they're dolphins."</p>
<p>"No they're not! They're called ‘killer <em>whales</em>’. Really,” Aziraphale tutted disapprovingly, “you’re incorrigible."</p>
<p>"Yes, they’re colloquially referred to as ‘killer whales’ but they're actually a type of dolphin."</p>
<p>"Crowley, stop it, that isn't true!" Aziraphale objected, rolling over to glare playfully at him.</p>
<p>"It's absolutely true!"</p>
<p>"I'm going to look it up!"</p>
<p>"By all means."</p>
<p>Aziraphale sat up and pulled his stylish new smartphone, complete with tartan case, out of his pocket, then squinted at it.</p>
<p>“I need my reading glasses, they’re in my coat pocket.”</p>
<p>Crowley grumbled a bit and placed his hands gently on Aziraphale’s hips to hold him still, and Aziraphale’s body flooded with heat, his skin tingling beneath Crowley’s fingers.</p>
<p>“It’ll respond to voice commands, you know. Give it here.”</p>
<p>Crowley stretched towards him to pluck the phone from his hand, looking very sure of himself indeed. He touched one of the icons on the screen before starting to speak into the phone.</p>
<p>"Ok Google, are orcas dolphins?"</p>
<p>
  <em>“Orcas, or killer whales, are the largest of the dolphins and one of the world's most powerful predators.”</em>
</p>
<p>Crowley stuck his tongue out at him, which Aziraphale found extraordinarily distracting.</p>
<p>"Told you,” Crowley said smugly, handing Aziraphale’s phone back to him.</p>
<p>"Learn that in your fancy science degree as well, did you? Or was that just where you learnt how to terrify plants? I can't believe you actually do that, I always assumed you made it up trying to be funny for the show."</p>
<p>"Works, doesn't it? Now shush, you're missing the dolphins.”</p>
<p>Aziraphale lay back down and cuddled up to Crowley again, watching the orcas for a while before a thought suddenly occurred to him. He took his phone out of his pocket and pressed the icon Crowley had pressed before, rolling over to look at Crowley.</p>
<p>"Hello Google,” Aziraphale said primly, and Crowley groaned and covered his face.</p>
<p>“You have to say, ‘Ok Google’,” he whispered, presumably so as not to confuse the phone, “otherwise it won’t work.”</p>
<p>“<em>Ok</em> Google, are dolphins a type of whale?"</p>
<p>
  <em>“First thing's first: all dolphins are whales, but not all whales are dolphins.”</em>
</p>
<p>Crowley grimaced and Aziraphale laughed victoriously.</p>
<p>"Ok, ok, whatever, give me that." Crowley tried to prise the phone out of his hand, and Aziraphale resisted for a while, until Crowley was leaning most of his weight on him and Aziraphale couldn't even concentrate enough to maintain his grip anymore. He let go suddenly, causing Crowley to lose his balance and fall on top of him. Aziraphale’s breathing quickened. He looped his arms around Crowley and let his hands drift up the length of his back and up into his hair. He could feel the way Crowley shivered in response.</p>
<p>Crowley set Aziraphale’s phone down carefully on the coffee table and then looked intently into his eyes.</p>
<p>“That felt nice,” Crowley murmured, his voice rough. He propped himself up on his elbow and carded his fingers through Aziraphale’s hair. Aziraphale closed his eyes and sighed contentedly.</p>
<p>“Crowley?”</p>
<p>“Mmm?”</p>
<p>“Do you mind if I learn about whales another time? I’m a little distracted.”</p>
<p>Crowley chuckled softly and turned off the television. “What would you like to do instead?”</p>
<p>“I’d really like to kiss you.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, me too.”</p>
<p>Crowley closed the distance between them, and when their lips met it was even more exhilarating than the most enthusiastic round of applause at the end of a flawless performance, than walking out of the front door of the Celestial Publishing building for the very last time, even more than surviving a zombie apocalypse. It was sweet and tender, but with passion bubbling just beneath the surface, a promise of what was yet to be explored.</p>
<p>Aziraphale had discovered, just as Crowley had once told him, that he was stronger than he realised, and that he could go anywhere and do anything he wanted to do without letting his fears stand in his way. But the prospect of doing all of that with <em>Crowley</em> at his side was something even better, and if he ever did end up having to face the end of the world, all that mattered to him was that they would do so together.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this slightly different take on an apocalypse that didn't actually happen, and another fic in honour of radio Crowley's powers of hypnotism. ;-)</p>
<p>This fic (except for the falling in love part hehe) was inspired by Derren Brown's <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x09PDP6YX7A">"Apocalypse"</a>, in which he basically does what happened in this fic, but without entering into the scenario himself. One of Derren's shows actually features David Tennant (including DT in a wetsuit actually) - <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nORZ2YRH0Y">here</a> if you're interested!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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